<<< More 'Opinionated Traveller' stories
True Blue |
Something that is true blue is patriotic, dinky-di, authentic, Australian. A bit hackneyed these days. 'Blue' is a nick name for someone with red hair.
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Roo's |
Roo's or kangaroo's have a special status in Australia. Rather than revered roo’s are considered vermin in most of Oz. On a long distance road trip it isn't unlikely that you will encounter a few roo's on the road at sunset. The normal procedure is to roll them as flat as a pancake. Trying this in a small to mid-sized car is not recommended as the roo will almost certainly come off far better than you. Driving a two-trailer, thirty-six-wheel, eighty-ton roadtrain makes it a different prospect, however.
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Abbreviated Australians |
The correct abbreviation for Australia is Oz and the correct abbreviation for an Australian is Aussie, pronounced "ozzee". Variations such as "Ozzie", "Auz" or "Ossie" or for that matter Yanks pronouncing "Aussie" as "Ossie" are abominations and should precipitate a quick slap round the face for the utterer. [Back to the story] |
Barbie |
Barbies or barbecues as they're known to the rest of the world are a pretty central part of the Australian cultural tradition. They're not quite as dead-animal-heavy as the American version, but incinerating protein outdoors is definitely one of the must-do items on any tourist's Australian checklist. [Back to the story] |
Footy |
A footy is an oval ball much like a rugby ball or an American grid-iron football. The game "Australian Rules" in which it is utilised however is fairly unique. Aussie Rules features goals made from four upright posts, the inner two marking a "goal" and the outer two marking a "point". The object of the game is to distract the referee long enough to be able to cripple members of the opposing team with unspeakable acts of violence. Then, when your opponents have all been hospitalised, you can punt the ball through the goals whereupon a little white leprechaun sprouts out of the ground and waves a pair of white flags to denote the surrender of the other team (and you’ll probably think I’m joking till you get to see your first game). [Back to the story] |
Kiwis |
There is a well known rivalry between New Zealand and Australia, much like that between Holland and Germany or England and France. Like most of these, it is based mainly on false stereotypes and I for one will be happy to continue to lend the Kiwi’s our culture, cricketers, rugby players, economy and sheep until they get some of their own. [Back to the story] |
Rule number one for Oz - treat everyone like your equal because they almost certainly will be treating you that way. (The nice flip side is that they don't treat you like 'another damn tourist' but more like a friend). This does not apply to shop assistants in the Queen Victoria Building in Sydney.
Rule number two for Oz - don't stick your hand under anything that a frog might hide under. This applies to televisions sets, newspapers and letter boxes. Oh and there's always a Redback spider (highly poisonous) under the toilet seat - it's traditional.
Rule Number three for Oz - make sure you've got time to see everything. It's a big place.